Lady Palutena's Farting Problem
by Farting Palutena
Summary: Lady Palutena farts for you, big guys like me, and all the Smashers! But the farting is not her problem, it's a problem for everyone else! Can almost all of the Smashers band together to tolerate Lady Palutena farting, or will they faint from the divine gas of the Goddess of Light?
1. Chapter 1

Lady Palutena farted as she waved her right hand frequently to get the smell away. "Phew! I really stunk up the room! Eww!" She then laughed, enjoying it despite the sulfur like odor her big butt was loudly emitting like a tuba.

"Tell me about it..." Pit remarked as he had his nose pinched by his left hand, trying not to breathe in the gas. "You may be a wonderful, divine figure, Lady Palutena... but your farting is so... gross."

"I can't help it, my adorable angel boy." Palutena remarked as she let out another brassy fart that caused the green couch she was sitting on to melt, gasping as she glanced down. "Oh my! Excuse me, mister couch! Sorry!"

Both of the Kid Icarus characters were in their room, of which they shared together within the Smash Manor, but it was hard for Pit to tolerate his goddess' frequent flatulence, as it was starting to smell just as strong as it sounded. The paint on the walls was beginning to peel from Palutena's farts.

"Lady Palutena, maybe you should get Master Hand to zap you with some magic that makes your... gas smell like vanilla ice cream?" Pit suggested as he rubbed the back of his head with his right hand, blinking. "I mean, you should ask him to make you... break wind less!"

Palutena frowned as she stood up, bending over with her hands on her hips as she farted again. "But I like farting! There's nothing more fun for me to do than farting!"

"...don't you like being playful?" Pit commented as he squinted his eyes, still pinching his nose.

Palutena nodded, rolling her right hand around. "I do, yes. But I also like farting." She then pointed her butt at Pit and farted, giggling as she walked out, continuously farting as the entire room smelled horrendously awful.

Pit was knocked back on his butt, the stink getting to him as his face turned green, causing him to puke as he whimpered. "Ugh... Lady Palutena, wonderful Goddess of Light, why must you be so gross and dangerous...?"


	2. Chapter 2

Lady Palutena hummed as she spotted R.O.B. and Lucina breaking the red and white targets. She smiled as she approached the two, entering the target practice room.

"I'm shocked to see both of you two in here at the same time." Palutena commented, folding her arms.

Lucina rubbed the back of her head. "Me and R.O.B. have been getting along very well. He understands all of my problems!"

"Yes. The future from where Lucina hails from is quite interesting." R.O.B. stated as he nodded his metal head in agreement. "I should point out that the targets floating around here are quite troublesome. Me and Lucina got most of them, but they just keep floating away."

"Targets floating away, huh?" Palutena chuckled as she felt a rumble in her stomach, pushing both of the Smashers to the side as she turned around and bent over, placing her hands on her big butt. "Let me show you how a goddess does it..."

Lucina and R.O.B. watched in disbelief as Palutena farted, her brassy poots destroying the targets as there wasn't a single red and white target left for anyone to Smash. The smell of Palutena's flatulence was quite strong, causing Lucina to pinch her nose with her left hand while waving the air with her right hand, feeling a bit sick as Palutena laughed.

"_Ewww!_ Lady Palutena, that stinks so bad!" Lucina admitted as she felty like she was going to barf. "You need to watch what you eat!"

Palutena chuckled as she shrugged, closing her eyes. "Well... I am a pretty bad cook!" She admitted as she continued farting her tuba like toots as she walked past Lucina and R.O.B., leaving the target practice room as her farts caused the hallway to shake a bit.


	3. Chapter 3

Lady Palutena was farting, you know IN THE BATHROOM, as she was taking a Luigi, being in her own bathroom as the real Luigi himself walked in, feeling somewhat insulted about his name being used as a fill in for pooping.

"How degrading!" Luigi stated as he flailed his arms in the air, outraged. "I'm treated as the punching bag, even when I'm used as the literal butt of jokes! I wish I got some respect!"

Suddenly a giant explosion shook the entire hallway as Palutena's flatulence was strong enough to make a hole in the bathroom that she was doing her business in, with Luigi blushing madly as his nose began bleeding, his eyes expanding as Palutena screamed.

"D-don't look at me! I'm baking brownies!" Palutena stated as she placed up a shield to hide herself from sight, continuing to fart away her brassy butt bombs.

R.O.B. headed down the hallway, seeing Luigi collapse as he turned his robotic head to see the giant purple shield Palutena summoned, squinting his electronic eyes as Palutena released one more trombone fart that caused the shield to break, revealing herself in the process as a loud splash was heard.

"...do you not have any decency?" R.O.B. remarked as he fired off a fully charged laser, in hopes that blasting Palutena would teach her not to reveal herself in the open while going to the bathroom.

Palutena responded with another shield, also farting again as it caused the hallway to shake and the laser to bounce, with it going right back into R.O.B. as it broke the robot into various pieces. Master Hand was floating down the hallway, looking down at the broken pieces of the Robotic Operation Buddy, then glancing up to see the big purple shield protecting Palutena from anyone looking at her doing number two, you know, IN THE BATHROOM.

"_...Really,_ Pal? Pooping in public view?" Master Hand stated in a disappointed tone as he snapped his fingers, causing the wall to be fixed up as he continued floating down the hall.


	4. Chapter 4

Lady Palutena farted as she was dancing, moving her big butt side to side as she was releasing her thunderous, tuba like brassy poots, stinking up the dancing room as the various other Smashers pinched their noses, trying not to breathe in the sulfur fumes that Palutena was belting out.

"Does she ever get tired of farting?" Megaman remarked as he was thankful that he could smell.

"No. She keeps letting them out of that fart factory of hers," The male Animal Crossing Villager remarked as he simply had his hands over his nose, which was practically painted on his face.

"I blame Peach for teaching her the ways of the farts," Jigglypuff stated as she also was grateful to not have a noise.

Palutena turned her head to the other Smashers as she kept dancing and farting, winking at them. "You wish you had the moves like me." She then got closer to the Smashers and bent over, unleashing her biggest brassy fart yet as it made all the Smashers stink horrendously.

"_Ewww!_" Most of the Smashers exclaimed as the force of Palutena's fart was strong enough to knock them off their feet.

"Well, if anyone needs me, I'm going to be in the shower for the next week entirely." Meta Knight growled as he wrapped his cape around himself, disappearing.

"Yeah! You can't funk the stunk!" Palutena stated as she slapped her right butt cheek, farting so strongly it caused the entire mansion to collapse.


End file.
